After a long and protracted three year conversation with one another, Anglican clerics in silly fancy dress have said marriage should only be between a man and a woman. 

This groundbreaking decision means they are just as homophobic, outdated and irrelevant as when they started the consultation process.

The LGBQTI Anglican clerical community has written an open letter condemning the non move. In it they indicated their intense irritation that an organisation claiming to be the moral leader of the country is in fact the most anachronistic bigoted bunch of gay haters this nation has to offer.

A Posh pointy hatted klan elder told us;

“Our community wants to point out that we recognise that the fleshy body of Jesus Christ resides within all of our members. If they were child-abusers we perhaps could’ve struck a deal, but those gays still make us feel queasy and they don’t deserve our blessing. We will show them love by praying for them after they have died and are burning in hell for eternity for their satanic lifestyle.

“If they want the blessings of our silly bejewelled dress wearing clerics then they have to stop being so gay. We take the complete lack of mention of gays in the words of our Lord Jesus very seriously indeed. This twirly golden staff thing-a-ma-bob represents the authority of the Anglican faith and I am charged with upholding it with the utmost dignity”

So it seems absolutely nothing has changed and the Anglican Church will continue expressing sentiments that would’ve had any commercial company seeing fines and prison terms years ago.

How very Christian of you all.