Scientists at Rochdale Community university have discovered that thickos will believe pretty much anything they see on Facebook.
“It’s astonishing really.” Professor Digory Kirke of Rochdale’s Applied Social Media Studies Department told us. “Idiots, or the alt-clever if you will, will believe absolutely anything provided it’s on Facebook or written on the side of a bus.”
Professor Kirke is credited with coining the phrase alt-clever in his groundbreaking paper “Seriously, people can’t actually believe this bollocks” which he wrote in response to The Leave Campaign’s claim that the NHS would get £350 million a week post Brexit.
“It’s the bus that sells it I think. Or perhaps just that it’s written down. The alt-clever don’t read much, they prefer pictures.”
“Unfortunately it appears that the alt-ethical, or evil if you will, have figured out that there are loads of really thick people who will believe anything. In fact there are more idiots around than people who can check facts or identify bollocks using their brain.”
The groundbreaking study is likely to have a huge impact on the way political campaigns are run in the future.
“You just need enough votes to get elected.” Kellyanne Conjob told The Rochdale Herald. “It really is quantity over quality in a democracy. You can say anything you like, it doesn’t seem to be illegal to lie, just unethical.”
The discovery by politicians and evil demagogues that half the people in the world are more stupid than the average voter and are all on Facebook isn’t going to do much for progress in the long run.
“Don’t believe everything you read, particularly if it’s on a bus or Facebook. Even this!”
