There were tense scenes outside the former Waitrose building in Rochdale’s upmarket Falinge Estate yesterday after crowds of militant political moderates and progressives clashed at the “Moderates Against Moderation” Rally.
Rochdale’s champagne socialists and pro-Corbyn anti-austerity neo-vegans were in the car park of the now derelict Waitrose superstore to demonstrate against racism, austerity and tribalism in British politics when the trouble started.
“It got ugly fast” said Superintendent Owen Coker of Greater Manchester Police. “It seems that the former Liberal Democrats and the anti-austerity vegans couldn’t decide which slogans to shout and began trying to talk over one another. Somebody was hit with a cardboard sign and another protester got a minor friction burn after being struck with a hemp handbag.”
A witness described a chaotic scene as the former Liberal-Democrats began chanting;
“What do we want? Better social mobility, free university places, a more tolerant society and less austerity? When do we want it? Whenever it’s convenient for you.”
While the Pro-Corbyn anti-austerity neo-vegans were chanting;
“What do we want? Fair social reform? When do we want it? In a timely and sensible manner.”
Political experts and academics up and down the country are expecting more chaos as centre-left conservatives and centre-right labour supporters flee for the middle ground. The Liberal Democrats have seen an eightfold increase in equiries about party membership since the 23rd June with eight new members.
That bloke who’s the leader of the Liberal Democrats is said to be “ecstatic”.
