Ancient search engine and former email provider, Yahoo, has admitted that 1 billion of its users security has been breached.

Yahoo, which was once a multi billion dollar blue chip company is now run by its CEO, Barry Cheese, from his garden shed in Hove.

Mr. Cheese said;

“It was inevitable really. Back when people used Yahoo they all set their passwords as ‘password’. People just weren’t as savvy as they are now using fancy passwords like ‘Password1’ because of heightened security prompts.”

Long term Yahoo customer, Barry Sledge added;

“Who gives a fuck? I haven’t logged in for 18 years. No one ever emailed me back then anyway apart from Freeserve. What are they going to do next? Hack my MySpace account? I wish someone would and publish my password. I’ve forgotten it.”

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