Following the news that Cuba has offered to pay its £222 million Cold War debt to the Czech Republic in Rum, Brexit Secretary, David Davis has offered to pay the UK’s cost for leaving the EU in jam.
“It makes perfect sense” he said.
“We have a huge jam industry here in the UK and if our proposition is accepted we’ll only need to cut public spending by a further 95%”
The move has perplexed world leaders and EU officials with Jean Claude Junker already rejecting the offer;
“We already have Jam, this is a commodity we do not need.” He said.
“It is an insult to the Union, an insult to its members and insult to me personally. Where will the £50 billion worth of jam come from when Mr. Davis has deported all of the Polish workers who harvest his strawberries?”
An anonymous government source has informed us that a series of brain storming sessions have been arranged in order determine more appealing commodities that the UK can offer in the wake of Mr. Junker’s response.
So far Bovril and jellied eels have been the only other ideas suggested.
