British retail workers have revealed that they’re looking forward to signing on with blue passports.
Cliff Edge told us, “Not having a job or any money will be a drag. I’ll probably be feeling quite depressed wondering where my life is going when I’m getting to the dole office. But then I’ll whip my blue passport out and realise that everything is going to be magically ok. I’ll no longer be a slave. I’ll be unable to afford to do anything but I’ll have my freedom.”
Cliff told us, “I used to sign on with my driving license but I realised that had an EU flag on it and I was just a slave. I’d never known the freedom to order goods in pounds and ounces. Obviously, that’s not strictly true. There was nothing stopping me ordering using an archaic system of measurement. I just couldn’t do the conversion as I slept through most maths classes at school.”
Cliff went on, “It’s the little things in life that get you through these dark days. Like when you go to the shops and they’re selling ice cubes with a British flag on it. You might not be able to afford that ice but if you could it would be British. It’s a great comfort in the dark times.”
It’s understood that Nigel Farage would feel the same about his blue passport but as he has German nationality he’ll still be using his burgundy EU one when he visits the country on his way back to Moscow.
