Brexiteers have been quick to point out that 4,600 people being made redundant at Rolls Royce was on a different bus to the one that they saw.

Cliff Edge said, “You can’t say that company decisions like this have anything to do with Brexit. When companies make decisions on how they’re going to invest their money huge political changes like Brexit don’t come into it. It’s just managers because no company needs management and it’s a pure coincidence that Rolls Royce is positioning itself to have as few assets as possible in this country. Even Rolls Royce say it’s nothing to do with Brexit so clearly it’s nothing to do with Brexit.”

Andrea Leadsom was bullish on the news. She said, “Finally, the green shoots of Brexit are paying dividends. No longer will Britain be shackled by a need to make highly technical pieces of machinery. This is the first great step to everyone in the UK working either in soft fruit picking or Tesco.”

Soon to be unemployed workers seemed to agree. One told us, “I feel that I can finally do something I want to do. The last 30 years have been hard and to be honest it’s only really been preparation for when I fulfilled my destiny as a soft fruit picker. I’m relishing earning 4 quid for 17 hours work.”

The news comes in the same week that Jaguar Land Rover announced it is moving production to Slovakia from Coventry so that its new factory can concentrate on “new models”. It’s understood that the new models will be named the Range Rover Churchill and be available solely in Britain. Photographs seen by the Herald show a cut and shut Lada Riva on big chunky tyres.

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Fact checked by Snopes; Plagiarised by Andrew Neil; Nancy Sinatra's favourite Rochdale satirist; sued by Chris Froome and winner of the 1922 Nobel Prize for Chemistry.* *Not all of these necessarily true.