Biffer bashed as Veteran rejects attempt to hijack Remembrance Sunday
Remembrance Sunday is commemorated every year on the second Sunday of November to mark the end of World War I and remember the nations’s war dead. Big Ben (Massive Mohammed), which has been silent since August whist repair work is carried out, chimed at 11:00 GMT.
Unfortunately, as well as providing an important moment to reflect, Remembrance Sunday also attracts what Chelsea Pensioner Harry Basham, 86, referred to as the usual Walter Mitty fantasists seeking to roleplay in quasi-military regalia. Whilst sighing heavily, Mr Basham explained that despite Britain’s role in defeating fascism, the memorial service at the Cenotaph is catnip to Britain’s fascists. This is similar to how the EDL’s role in complaining about brown nonces is a magnet for the many white nonces that have joined their group over the years.
Mr Basham was describing an incident where one Paul Golding, of Britain First, attempted to cause a ruckus at the Cenotaph. Wearing his now traditional Remembrance uniform of a quasi-military bomber jacket and a pair of women’s knickers on his head, the unsuccessful candidate for London Mayor tried to muscle in on the service.
“I could tell from the off that he wasn’t proper military, he lacked the necessary bearing. He would have been welcome, even so, but he started banging on about Muslims, despite the many Muslims that served in the British Armed Forces who we also remembered today. So I told him his alien and destructive fascist doctrine was not welcome here, and he could take his Walting elsewhere.”
But Golding sought to continue to politicise remembrance, getting in the face of anyone not wearing a poppy, or committing other perceived transgressions like being caught in the possession of melanin.
Reports are that Mr Basham took action immediately. He directed a local Cub Scout troop to assault from the front, whilst he used his front line commando experience to target the fleshy and unprepared rear.
“I conked him with my collection tin as the signal, and then one of the cubs kicked him in the ging gang goolies. He doubled up, turning to face me. So I conked him with the tin again with a firm upwards blow to his porky chops. Then the sixer, well, let’s just say he briefly lowered the standard and took a run at his rear end before raising the colours.”
“I thought that might have been enough, but then little Valerie from the bowling club chucked a dam buster bouncing bomb, right into the landing zone. Mission Accomplished.”
If Britain First actually wanted to acknowledge the sacrifice of our war dead, the greatest gesture they could give is to stop terrifying members of our society and apologise for the insult they have served to our military men and women in carrying out their hatred.
