Police have released details of a massively successful anti-drugs operation conducted with the help of Shaun Ryder and Bez.
As the son of a police Detective Inspector, Bez feels very strongly about the fight against the drug trade. Having been invited to join the band Happy Mondays by Shaun Ryder, he became the band’s mascot and “freaky dancer”. He explains that, although he may have given the impression of being out of his face for the last 25 years, he actually used this style of interpretive dance to highlight the dangers of drugs and encourage teenagers to ‘just say no!’
A spokesman for Ryder, lead singer with the band, told us that Shaun is a lay preacher and, whilst his on stage persona might belie the fact, “has always extolled the virtues of abstinence and clean living. Honest!”
Head of the Greater Manchester Police Drugs Squad Inspector Ebeneezer Goode said yesterday “The lads posted an advert in the NME ‘wanted’ columns asking for a ‘supplier of substances’. Obviously this was a gig no drugs merchant in the country would want to pass up, and there were literally hundreds of applications.”
Sergeant John Cockayne-Barron continued “With the info the applicants supplied we were easily able to make our arrests.” Drugs with an estimated London street value of £8.5 million (£350k Rochdale street value) are thought to have been seized. Ryder and Bez have even volunteered to take time out of their busy schedule to dispose of the haul themselves during the Happy Monday’s 30th Anniversary tour in December.
Bez said “Always a pleasure to help the boys in blue” while Shaun Ryder requested that we stop twisting his melon.