Diane Abbott has shocked the nation by resigning from the shadow cabinet days before election week in order to be the new face of Soul Glo!
Nile Rodgers, best known for his musical work with daft punk and for writing the soundtrack to the 80s hit film, Coming to America starring Eddie Murphy, contacted Abbott late yesterday evening.
“I saw Ms Abbott in an interview on the BBC dodging a difficult question about the IRA. She started talking about her hair and how she had an ‘afro’ in the 80s.” Said Mr Rodgers
“Well it hit me like a bolt of greased lightening, Soul Glo! Diane’s hair is oh so silky smooth; she’d be the perfect model to relaunch the afro and Jerry curl hair care product in the UK.”
We spoke to the MP for Hackney North and Stoke Newington, she said.
“I was contacted by Mr Rodgers who played his guitar down the phone whilst singing ‘let it shine through baby, just let your soul glow!’
Well, it’s the first time I’ve felt sexy since Jeremy Corbyn gave me an oily massage in 1979; so I thought bugger it, Politics isn’t getting me anywhere, why not start modelling.”
The news is met with great support from Labour members, who are glad she’ll no longer be a walking talking liability for the party.
