Vodafone chief executive Nick Jeffrey has apologised to customers for its poor service after being fined £4.6 million by OFCOM.
Mr Jeffrey said the fine was proportionate, and that as they’ve avoided paying a fair bit of tax through offshore arrangements this year, ponying up is not a problem.
Reading out a statement he said;
“We’d like to thank the regulator for appearing to take action on this matter. We particularly like the £0.6 million. Nice touch. Really gives the impression that they’ve thought about the number, when they could have just gone for a nice easy 5 million. As a multi-billion pound profit making company they’ve really pulled our metaphorical pants down and spanked us very very hard. 4.6 million is quite a lot. Honestly. Ouch. Our wallet.”
Mr Jeffrey then had a coughing fit and had to be comforted.
In related news, the details of this year’s Vodafone shareholders Christmas party were leaked online. Highlights include the loser of the US Presidential race performing the Balloon dance live on stage, Lamborghini destruction derby, a 5 endangered species hog roast and a bonfire of any ethics that may have found their way to the party.
