Amateur golfer and incest enthusiast Donald Trump has congratulated the UK’s infidelity champion Boris Johnson on becoming the latest worst Prime Minister in living history. 

“Congratulations to Boris Johnson. He will be great” President Trump told The Rochdale Herald after a massive rally for illiterate shitwits. “And he can fuck whoever he wants now that he’s really famous. Them’s the rules.”

Mr Johnson, who has long been favourite to take over from the current worst Prime Minister in living history, Theresa May, will be formally confirmed as the next self-serving pompous disaster to drag us further into the abyss after Theresa May meets the Queen tomorrow.

Boris, the living embodiment of a decline in standards of hygiene, decency, decorum and backbone will really become Prime Minister tomorrow.

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.