Bus drivers distraught they can’t lose their shit when given a fiver, due to increased ticket prices.
Up and down the country local bus drivers are in a state of disbelief as they can no longer have a complete benny on when a passenger hands them a five pound note.
With a single bus ticket now averaging £2.07, bus drivers have no choice but to accept it with grace and hand back the correct change.
Stephen Aldington of the Bus Driver’s Union commented, “For many years bus drivers have had an arrangement that if a passenger presented the driver with a five pound note they were perfectly within their rights to respond completely disproportionally to the customer, behaving like they have tried to pay their fare in kiddie porn”.
Rich Pastrami, a regular passenger on the 83 bus feels that the new system is yet another British custom falling by the wayside, “I really will miss the driver turning bright red, the exaggerated rummaging in the change drawer and the insane muttering about running me down next time.”
An official spokesman told us there has been no change in the current guidance for when a bus driver is given a ten pound note. They are still likely to have an actual stroke.
