A rogue nation, governed by a lunatic, could be about to start a nuclear war on North Korea.
The country, known in its native tongue as ‘Murica, has been rogue since the January 20th of this year, ever since a mad despotic tyrannical leader took power.
“It’s scary over there,” North Korean leader Kim Jong Un told the Rochdale Herald. “They say in the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is king, but this is the other way around. They are a population of semi-literates, ruled by a complete illiterate. I fear for North Korea’s safety.”
This new leader, who goes by the name of Trump, and reportedly likes to put his name on as many buildings as he can, has been splashing out on the warmongering rhetoric ever since coming to power.
Mr Trump was unavailable for comment, but his public broadcasts have indicated a definite willingness o his part to launch nuclear attacks, asking what the point is in having nuclear weapons if you don’t use them.
North Korea isn’t the only nation that has been feeling the wave of aggression from this threat to world peace. Mexico, although not in the nuclear firing line, has been frequently mentioned in ‘Murican rhetoric. There has been frequent talk of the construction of a gigantic border wall between the two countries.
Mexican president Enrique Pene Nieto had this to add to the North Korean response.
“We are baffled,” he said. “We have no hostile intent towards his country and his people, and yet he keeps on talking about a wall, which is completely impractical.”
In the eight months since he became leader, Mr Trump has behaved aggressively towards anyone with a darker skin tone. Such racially motivated behaviour has been widely hailed as bizarre, coming as it does from the only man in the world with orange skin. Psychiatrists are at a loss to explain the incongruousness of this behaviour.
“You would think that someone with so different an appearance would know better than to hate others purely for theirs,” Dr Kenny Believitt said. “I wonder if maybe his brain is wired differently to normal humans – or maybe he comes from a different planet altogether.”
It’s certainly possible. Let’s just hope they find the answer before Trump finds the button.