Just before everyone’s new favourite actress Carrie Fisher died, 2016 did a couple of ‘aw, but they had a good innings’ deaths in a trend that’s continued throughout the year.
Before that, 2016 brutally murdered everyone’s new favourite singer George Michael, ‘a biggy’ by forcing him into a life of rich excess; part of a cruel plan spanning 30 years.
The nefarious 2016 said:
“You ain’t seen nuthin yet! Like your Elton do ya? Fond of your Queenie are ya? Watch this space, there’s gonna be proper fireworks on New Years Eve.”
She continued:
“Keep checking your Facebook newsfeeds for ‘BREAKING:’ though, because I’ve prepared three more little, let’s say, treats, before you all lose your shit just before 2017 pays a visit and really goes to town.”
