We at the Rochdale Herald really liked this headline but couldn’t think of a way of making even slightly believable.
What follows is some made up tripe about a load of crap that makes no sense;
Jebidiah W. Klamesalot, an unemployed ‘accidents in public and the workplace’ vlogger from Basildon, claimed that Police had unlawfully attacked him outside a Scope charity shop last July.
On his Youtube channel, ‘Scammer Slammer’, which has the tagline; ‘Money for nothing from trips, falls and feds’, Klamesalot said;
“I was walking up Basildon High street chomping on my Greg’s steak slice when the feds were all up in my face like. They wanted to know where I was going and I’m like it’s non of your fucking business Po Po.”
He continued;
“The next thing I know I was getting a good shoeing for nothing. One of them piggys even spat it my face. When I came round I seen they’d beaten me black and blue but my mum and my mates were convinced I was white and gold. Anyways, I’m sewing the 5-O innit.”
With no witnesess and no CCTV footage to back up his claims his case isn’t looking good.
Chief Superintendent Geoffrey Palmer of the Basildon Policing said;
“The man’s a fantasist.”
