In a massive boost for the right of The Labour Party, Owen Smith was spotted and recognised in a Tesco Express in Camden yesterday. Scum sucking traitorous coup plotting back stabbers rejoiced as the news broke.
At a conference in Islington Labour MP Barry Fudgephucker said to our reporter Simeon Oates;
“This is terrific news. Jeremy is done for now that people know who Owen is. We had a false alarm a few weeks ago when he was spotted in Aldi but the bloke thought he was called Owen Eagle”.
At this point Jeremy Corbyn appeared out of the crowd and our interview was cut short as Mr. Fudgephucker turned and hugged him before falling to the ground and kissing his feet.
We caught up with Eileen Trowbrige who spotted Mr. Smith and she said “I knew his face from somewhere and at first I thought it was that Baldrick from time team but it soon became obvious to me that is was Tory MP Owen Smith.
Since challenging Mr. Corbyn a spokesman for Mr. Smith insisted that “he has won the support of a vast amount of people throughout his campaign, a least enough to fill a pretty big room”.
He went on “The leadership campaign continues and it is vital that Owen is elected if we are to become a serious opposition. Your vote counts so if you were born between 4th and the 6th November 1969, have been a Labour member for at least 15 consecutive years, don’t drink alcohol or use social media and have paid the mandatory £500 fee then please register to vote between 1:37am and 1:38am on the 20th August”.
