Britain has revealed it is spoiled for choice on which incompetent aresehole it has leading it.
A spokesman told us, “Everyone is cheering at the prospect of a fresh Prime Minister with new ideas to lead us to Albion. Then you look at the alternatives and realise it’s just a stream of people you wouldn’t trust with scissors. The favorite is a fat mop whose negotiating skills got Nazaneen Zaghari-Ratcliffe an extension to her Iranian prison sentence.”
He went on, “Another favorite is a man who pretended that he had done extensive impact assessments on leaving the EU when in fact he’d actually spent a year watching topless darts on TV and knapping in his office.”
It doesn’t end there either. The spokesman told us, “Dominic Raaaaaaaab fancies a go. The man who was surprised to discover that Britain is an island. There’s also Jeremy Hunt, a man who doesn’t know if he’s married a Japanese or a Chinese lady. Or you can have the bloke in the ill-fitting suit who bemoans the abolition of the Corn Laws.”
“Then you look at the opposition. It’s basically a bloke with a beard who through either lack of intellect or senile dementia keeps forgetting he’s the opposition. We’d have been better off with Lord Bucket Head. At least he had policies.”
It’s understood that should Britain fail to find a home grown Prime Minister it may draft a foreigner in to do the job. The spokesman said, “Robert Mugabe would be an improvement in all honesty. And he’s pretty free at the moment.”
Many US analysts have been following proceedings with great interest as this is the sort of Sophie’s Choice American’s will face if Donald Trump is ever impeached and Mike Pence takes over.
