Donald Trump could pardon himself of a crime he repeatedly says he hasn’t committed. That’s according to his lawyer, Rudy Giuliani.
Giuliani said, “It may seem strange to many people that POTATUS may choose to pardon himself of a crime that they didn’t commit. But that’s because not everyone can be the sort of legal genius that POTATUS is. There are certain things that could be damaging for him such as all the evidence that is collected pointing to him being completely guilty of the crime he most definitely didn’t commit. In such a case there are several things he could do. He could use his power to dissolve the special counsel but that would make him look guilty. As he is entirely innocent of all these accusations then the logical thing to do is pardon himself. Of course, this won’t be the only thing he’ll pardon himself of.”
Although, to many people, pardoning yourself of a crime you say you definitely didn’t commit make look a little shady but that’s not the case. That’s why POTATUS will you the opportunity to pardon himself for the assassination of Abraham Lincoln, Julius Caesar and several business deals that were allegedly illegal.
Giuliani went on, “When I talk to POTATUS I only see an innocent man. This man has had so much to deal with in his life. He was born into immense wealth and privilege, had access to great schooling and is bright orange. He’s had several failed marriages due to his own terrible decision making and total lack of impulse control. He’s brought up children almost single headedly. It’s not been an easy route for him so he deserves to use his power to pardon himself.”
It’s alleged that POTATUS learned of the ability to pardon himself of the crime he definitely didn’t commit at a meeting he definitely didn’t have with a Russian lawyer who was definitely not in Trump Tower. The allegation that Vladimir Putin now has a gold toilet from the same gold supplier as POTATUS is entirely a coincidence.
