There was a much needed boost for disabled theatre lovers today, as a West End theatre confirmed they had secured the use of Ant McPartlin’s forehead as a ramp for wheelchair access as part of the Geordie star’s community service for drink drive charges.
Further to the recent success of B&Q using Wayne Rooney’s bonce for the similar use as part of his recent community service, theatre chiefs enquired about renting ‘the other one from Biker Grove’s’ forehead to take the heat off their oft-perceived lack of access for wheelchair using theatre lovers.
A press release from The Adelphi Theatre, who confirmed they will be using McPartlin’s not inconsiderable forehead at the opening of the much anticipated Ed Sheeran musical ’50 Shades of Beige’, could not hide their delight.
‘It’s a well known fact that West End theatres have just the 1 ramp between us, much to the chagrin of snowflakes everywhere, so we are absolutely delighted to secure this trial to give our wheelchair bound theatre aficionados the chance to be bored on a regular basis.’
Meanwhile, the enforced absence of McPartlin from the prime time show ‘Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway’ sparked rumours of a new co-host, with Nigel Farage 2/1 to take the hot seat, after showbiz insiders hinted he’s ‘the only man with the head big enough to fill it’
