According to widespread reports somebody on Instagram has only gone and poached an egg.
Rumours are spreading that the egg poacher may have in fact poached two concurrently and placed them artistically on some wilted spinach.
“They were poached to perfection.” Instagram dickhead Thomas “Tom” Thomas of Birkenhead told The Rochdale Herald.
“They really looked quite tasty. I’m not that keen on spinach to be honest. But you can’t post a photo of a breakfast without some wilted seasonal greens. We’re not animals.”
“I expect they would have been quite tasty but by the time I managed to find the pine nuts to artistically sprinkle on them and drizzle them with some rapeseed oil I was late for the bus. They’d have been cold anyway.”
“I did get a good photo of them though. Don’t worry I’m not hungry I managed to grab a sausage and egg McMuffin on the way to work.”
“Didn’t take a photo of it though.”
