Donald Trump has begun his seventeen day summer vacation on a high after winning an international competition at his private golf course in New Jersey with a hole in one through a difficult windmill challenge.
Trump made an impressive start in front of a small group of visiting dignitaries, as he teed off from a tiny replica of the Taj Mahal.
“Have you seen the Taj Mahal they have overseas?” President Trump said smacking the small ball on its way.
“Really tiny. I’ve seen photos. Their Taj Mahal doesn’t even reach the edge of the photograph. There’s sky overhead. So much sky. Look at my Taj Mahal. It’s almost as big as me. But I’m definitely bigger than both Taj Mahals. I make more money too.”
The next challenge was the wall with Mexico. But it was no significant problem for Donald this time around, as he deftly chipped the ball over the transparent glass barrier into the mouth of a fibreglass Chihuahua.
Encouraged by constant cheers from his caddy and support team, Donald lengthened his lead through Mount Trumpmore and the miniature Trumphenge, before being briefly held up negotiating the replica slums of Rio de Janiero as he putted towards the feet of the life-size statue of Trump the Redeemer.
Victory seemed assured as Donald tackled the penultimate hole, steering his ball skilfully between water hazards, with his assistant needing to put the ball back on the fairway only twice.
After a gruelling two hours in the sun, Trump faced the slowly rotating windmill blades of the course’s famously challenging conclusion, as observers wondered if this wasn’t his greatest presidential challenge to date?
But Trump was not to be beaten, and as his almost one hundred strong team prepared the candyfloss machine and engraved his name on the trophy, Donald stood firm, defied his doubters and guided his perfectly-timed ball into the open arms of victory.
