By means of adding injury to insult, nefarious super villain and national traitor Jeremy Corbyn went one step lower in his ceaseless quest to disrespect our glorious monarch Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II by giving her a massive wedgie today at a glitzy Royal Gala that he’d most probably gatecrashed.
Yesterday’s shock announcement that ‘Red Jez’ had failed to bow to the Queen when he wasn’t actually meant to caused revulsion and severe biliousness in our readership; that even a man so single mindedly devoted to evil and whose ceaseless efforts against everything that we stand for and hold dear as a nation could be capable of such a despicable act of following correct protocol under the circumstances (such as not bowing when he wasn’t actually supposed to) reduced every decent upstanding citizen of even the most flimsy moral fortitude into fits of uncontrolled vomiting in revulsion.
Today’s incident is rumoured to have taken place at a charity junket in the swanky surroundings of the reception and breakfast area of Neasden’s Travelodge; while Her Majesty’s attention was diverted by some toast that someone had dropped, Corbyn apparently sneaked up from behind, took firm hold of her undercrackers and, shouting the word ‘Wedgie!’, pulled them upward firmly and sharply so they were clearly visible above the waistline of Her Primark jeggings; furthermore, onlookers reported a tearing noise emanating from the fabric in the gusset area of her shreddies. Her Majesty was described by Travelodge staff as ‘inconsolable’.
That a 104 year old woman could be treated in such a fashion must surely rank Corbyn as the worst and most despicable character in all of history, worse even than Hitler or Jonathon King.
Corbyn himself was unavailable for comment following the incident as he was reportedly due to perform a surprise act of Seagulling on a recuperating HRH The Duke Of Edinburgh at the King Edward VII hospital in London later this afternoon.
