Members of the hard left have announced plans to protest at the Grenfell fire by looting and setting fire to local shops it has emerged.
Brother David told the Herald,
“The Government’s response has been poor on this. We need to take a stand. There’s a McDonald’s over there and a furniture shop down the road. They’re symbols of the Tory bourgeois scum that needs purging. That furniture shop owner is a total Kulak. If a left wing Government were in charge the fire would never have happened.”
Sister Drusilla said, “There’s a lack of equality here. We’re going to make everyone equal by burning everything down round here.”
Some have alleged that the groups who make up the hard left are politicising a tragedy for their own ends. A charge denied by Brother Johnny,
“Nah way are we politicising a tragedy. Everyone is just sick of the unelected tories being in charge. If we burn McDonald’s and maybe Nando’s down they’ll see we’re serious and we’ll overthrow them. Plus I really need some new trainers so looting Foot Locker would be really useful.”
Another member, Brother Ed who gets all his knowledge from films, comic books and The Canary said,
“The Government are on their knees and can’t go on much longer. The Canary says it just needs the right bit of pushing and they’ll fall. It’s true because that’s not the main stream media saying that. Then it will be like Battleship Potemkin. Everyone will rise up against the Government because everyone knows the British people are always up for a bit of revolution. Particularly if it’s led by someone who calls them scum if they don’t burn a branch of Spar down.”
Sister Rosetta who describes herself as an activist told us,
“We at the Trotsky peace and love for all people movement didn’t think this was a good idea. Then someone pointed out Trotsky’s role in creating the Red Army. I’m well up for burning stuff now. It’s what Trotsky would have wanted.”
Comrade Little, spokesman for the United Socialist Workers Front told us,
“I’ve been involved in this stuff for years. Last time I went to a McDonald’s wearing my V for Vendetta mask. The guy serving didn’t watch films or read comic books so I had to clarify that I didn’t want the restoration of a Catholic theocracy.
Then I had to explain the plot of the whole film to him. Once I’d done that I brought western capitalism to its knees by not paying for my Big Mac and burning the upstairs down. That’ll learn him.”
Some members we spoke to commented on the timing.
Sister Bassett told us, “This year marks 100 years since the Russian revolution. It’s time to remember this and use it as our inspiration as we rise up and throw off the shackles of our bourgeois oppressors.
The Russian revolution ended will didn’t it? I’ve never really read about it. The choice at the last uprising I went to was between looting Waterstones and looting Next. I chose Next. I watched Dr Zhivago in English and it seemed to go alright.”
