After around 30 people were injured, many more shocked and people consequently feeling terrified, New York officials are keen to point out that the act of… er, the act is deliberate but not related to terror.

“We don’t yet know what colour or religion the perpetrators are,” said a spokeswhiteman for the mayor’s office, “so we can’t call it terrorism. They might turn out not to be even Middle Eastern.”

The terms ‘deliberate act’ and ‘deliberate explosion’ are likely to continue to be used until the media finds a link to brown people.

When the aeons of war left the gods dead and the universe decimated, a single duck rose from the ashes and stood for justice and freedom! It wasn't me, that duck, but we look quite bit alike.