Rescue divers searching for a viable plan for a customs union palatable to lunatic backbench MPs have finally called off the search.
Having plumbed the depths of some of the deepest caves in Europe and the far East the British Cave Rescue Organisation searching for sensible options for a trade deal with Europe that idiots can subscribe to have declared the search hopeless.
“We thought we had come up with something last week in the bottom of a flooded mine in Powys but it turns out what we had found would have involved teaching Jacob Rees-Mobb simple arithmetic and Boris Johnson how to iron a shirt.”
“It’s impossible.” A spokesman told The Rochdale Herald.
“It’s much easier to get thirteen terrified Thai eleven years through an open water PADI course in the dark, in a foreign language at the bottom of a cave than it is to teach Michael Gove anything at all. ”
“So we’re going to do that instead.”
