Emmanuel Macron has a well deserved reputation as a man who knows what an older lady likes.
Now it seems he’s out to shag Brexit by wooing Theresa May.
May has a reputation for being colder than a can of coke in a polar bear’s paws but not when a special Frenchman is on the case.
Reports indicate they began the evening with escargot, cuisses de grenouille (May personally tearing off the frog’s legs) and moved swiftly onto steak tartare.
May is rumoured to have swooned as Macron slaughtered a stable looking horse and minced its meat up in his hands, before holding out a palm full.
May is alleged to have even lapped up the blood and mince from his hand like a puppy, saying,
“Ooo, Macron, does this give you an increased majority?”
May was that puppy in attitude. Messy. Too enthusiastic. Just so happy someone was being nice to her.
Senior Brexiters in the government are said to be livid after viewing footage of the love in. A matter not improved by scenes of May doing a solo Mexican wave as France took England out in the football.
Expect a Brexit u-turn from May any day as Emmanuel Macron attempts to shag Brexit dreams away.
