There are fears for the safety of a missing Rochdale Golden Retriever who is reportedly suffering an “existential crisis.”
Graeme, a six year old Goldie from Middleton went missing whilst walking near Stanney Brook on Boxing Day.
Professor of Dog Psychology at Rochdale Community University, JK Howling, who has been counselling Graeme for the last two years told us.
“We’ve been working on some really deep issues” Said Professor Howling “he’s worried that he’ll ever find out who’s been a good boy. At least that’s what I think the problem is. He’s a dog.”
His owners told a press conference earlier today; “Graeme we just want you to come home. It’s you Graeme. You’re the good boy, it’s always been you.”
Professor Howling added; “living with uncertainty and questions about the nature of your identity. Or even bigger questions like ‘who’s a good boy?’ will take their toll long term. At least I think they do. They’re dogs, I mostly work with dogs. Seriously Dog Psychology is really a thing, genuinely.”
If you have any information about Graeme the missing Goldie or find any ‘clues’ he may have left behind feel free to share them with your local MP.
