Other News

Everyone in Britain awoke this morning overjoyed to know they are one more day closer to losing their freedom of movement across Europe and getting are country back. The ability to move freely across twenty...

Using drugs that are not banned but enhance performance is definitely not cheating." That's what head of British cycling Zammo Maguire says today. McGuire was speaking after a Parliamentary report was released on alleged doping....

Bosses at the BBC are poised to announce a list of new TV shows to better reflect the religious views of it's viewers. As announced recently, the BBC has been tasked by it's controllers...

Love island viewers were last night in shock after it was revealed the island is to be transformed into a syphilis colony. The revelations came in response to Jonny revealing he has crabs. Camilla and...

A Rochdale cyclist has spent the entire week explaining to people he works with how he knows the Earth is flat. Carl Isles, cycles the ten miles to work and back everyday and still gets...

Brexit supremo David Davis has suffered a minor road accident when he tried, and failed, to negotiate a corner. Healthcare professionals were on the scene immediately to ensure that Davis's hard exit was achieved.  The...

David Davis is to take a back seat in the upcoming Brexit negotiations, having decided that a two year old called Davis Davis from Rochdale would do a better job of getting the best...

A multi-million organisation has insisted that there's nothing suspicious at all about the new data policy updates, despite them being completely and utterly suspicious. 'The easiest thing to do is to just accept the terms...

Lord Chris Greyling, Secretary of State for Transport, revealed this afternoon that the government is considering changing its mind over HS2 out of health and safety concerns. The major concern stems from the worry that...

The Mail-online has sought to reassure readers that it was a slack-jawed, lazy, drunken black man who bought the fridge that started the Grenfell tower blaze. The 'news source' which has access to files that...

President Trump used his recent address to the UN Security Council to threaten ‘rocket man’ Sir Elton John, who he accuses of attempting to develop nuclear weapons which could reach the mainland United States....

The University of Life's School of Law is under investigation today after a study found that 98% of its graduates don't understand the basic principles of the law. Chief Inspector Bill Board told us, "The...

The Government quickly moved to exempt itself from the report released yesterday which found major inequalities on racial grounds in UK organisations. Speaking without coughing her guts up for once, Prime Minister Teresa 'Honky'...

Netflix have been named as winners of a bidding war that saw them win the rights to show the hit Korean show, Kim'll Fix It. The show started life when Kim would travel around North...

Research has found that the average bloke considering buying his wife lingerie this Christmas should probably not. "For a start, most blokes buy scarlet nylon things that no woman who already has a bloke would...

A Rochdale champagne socialist has accidentally revealed that the cost of scrapping tuition fees would be £100bn. Anthony Taylor-Twyford revealed the cost at a press conference after consuming too much warm Prosecco. Speaking to the...