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SHOCK as England fans vote 52 to 48 to LEAVE the World Cup

There is widespread shock around England today after the English voting public voted 52% to 48% for the England football team to leave the World Cup despite making it into the semi-finals. Following the vote...

Urinating Salford goalie earns whole side a place in England’s World Cup squad

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Almost the entire Salford lineup have been selected as part of England’s squad for next year’s World Cup, it has emerged. All the English players from the team have been picked to represent their...

Belgian football riot shows EU is hungry for UK exports says Liam Fox

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A football riot at a Belgian football match between Anderlecht and Club Brugge demonstrates the hunger for British exports according to Liam Fox. In a statement Fox said, "So many people want to do our...

FA launch tactical nuclear strike at semi-final of Women’s Euro 2017

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The Football Association has long been implacably opposed to the rise of the women’s game. When it first got popular, the FA acted swiftly and banned it in 1921. However, with the rise of...

The Rochdale Herald’s Top Ten Tips for Real Supporters and True Football Fans

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In honour of signing world famous football man Neville Southall to the Rochdale Herald, here are our top ten tips for real supporters and true football fans. Go football men! 1- Buy your special football...

Moaning Mourinho In Lip Wobble Outburst

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The future of games at Old Trafford are in doubt after Manchester United Manager Jose Mourinho demanded the removal of peas from referee's whistles as part of a series of measures to reduce noise...

Dogs will be allowed on the Pitch during the World Cup in Russia

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Man's best friend can now get even closer to the World Cup action. As Dogs will be allowed on the field during World Cup games.  Fifa announced today that during the World Cup, hosted by Russia, stray...

FIFA rejects World Cup draw rigging allegations after Russia selected to play against Russia

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FIFA have been forced to defend more allegations of corruption after the 2018 World Cup hosts, Russia, were selected to play against themselves in the group stages. The event saw Gary Lineker and Russian presenter...

Lib Dems thrilled at prospect of fielding a football team again

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Tim Farron says he's over the moon at being able to field a full football team of MP's. Mr Farron told the Herald. "This is great. I knew I was doing well when I got recognised...

David White follows The Rochdale Herald on Twitter

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The editorial team were said to be jubilant at the news this evening that former England, Leeds and Manchester City centre forward David White was following us on Twitter. They were a little bit disappointed...

Just £300,000 a month can feed a footballer for a whole week. Please give...

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It can be harrowing, truly tragic to see, to see a young, athletic, talented man to have to survive in squalid conditions, living on less than you paid for your house. That is why we...

Football players saving us all by not taking a pay cut

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The Professional Footballers Association have warned that a 30% cut in their members' wages would damage the NHS as it would reduce the amount of tax revenue the national purse received. Seriously. They actually said this. The...

Raheem Sterling to start giving guided tours of his tattoo’s

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England footballer, Raheem Sterling has said he's going to start offering tours of his tattoos. Sterling made the announcement when he met members of the English media yesterday to discuss his chances of getting...

East London Charity Shops on standby to get loads of West Ham training kit...

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East London charity shops are preparing for a bumper delivery of training kit and promotional items after West Ham appointed David Moyes to their bed-next-to-the-door Manager role. Moyes, who has come to specialise in...

Rochdale AFC Announce Stadium Expansion

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Rochdale's Spotland stadium is set to unveil a new corporate section "with a difference" above the Willbutts Lane stand, in honour of world famous local townsperson - Bill Oddie. "Bill has seemed a bit down...

Lukaku leaves second best club in Liverpool for second best club in Manchester

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Lukaku is thought to be worth approximately 50m but has signed for United with an additional premium unofficially known as the 'United surcharge'. Lukaku's agent, Rob Grubber explained "It's coz they's loaded innit? Everyone...
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