Power Hungry Admins Have New Axe To Wield

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With the advent of the all new ‘mute button’, passive, aggressive bitches everywhere are in their element. We spoke to one such angry woman, 32 year old Jemima McHunt, who told us “you’ve got...

Woman’s Instagram post about husband’s small penis causes backlash

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A wife's Instagram post about loving her husband's "cashew" sized penis has sparked a backlash online about just how dumb her husband is. American entrepreneur's wife Sarah Tripp, who describes herself as "wife to...

Facebook losing young members because of FIND OUT WHY BY CLICKING HERE NOW!!!!

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Facebook is losing young users because they're less susceptible to extremist clickbait than middle-aged idiots. Suggestible older plonkers who can't think for themselves are still joining the lucrative Russian mind control platform but young people...

Rochdale man has farmville farm repossessed by bailiffs

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This week, a local middle aged man had his FarmVille repossessed during a raid on his parents property on Friars Crescent.

Stickupthearseitis

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A new disease, spread apparently by social media, is endangering the nation. Stickupthearseitis affects hundreds of people everyday and symptoms include getting salty over satire and being a twat in the comment sections. “I have suffered...

Fictional article published too soon after imaginary incident

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A fictional article on a satirical site has been published too soon after an incident that didn't take place. The latest scandal to grip the internet is about a fictional article being published too soon...

Nation unites in devising final solution to Katie Hopkins

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The nation has been shaken by the cowardly attacks in Manchester. This terrible, cowardly attack on innocent concert goers is irrefutably horrible and humour cannot be derived from it.

Woman dismayed by number of volunteers after threatening Facebook cull

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A Rochdale woman today described feeling 'shocked and disappointed' by the number of people who volunteered to be removed from her friends list after she threatened a Facebook 'friend cull'. Charlotte Gainsborough, 25, made the...

Facebook adds ‘I am drunk button’

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Facebook has added an "I am drunk" button to the award winning range of useful buttons on your profile page. The button will immediately quarantine anything you add until midday the following day. The button has...

Labour reports sophisticated cyberattack after Jeremy Corbyn’s MySpace account is hacked

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The Labour Party has announced that it has been the subject of a cyberattack today. A spokesman told us, "We first became aware of the attack when Jeremy announced he could no longer access his...

Facebook in league with mouse manufacturers

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Mouse manufacturers are celebrating at the moment at the future increase in sales caused by Facebook’s determined but ultimately futile attempt to make you use the ’Top Stories’ feature of their increasingly rubbish social...

Piers Morgan behaves like a d**k on Twitter, again

Piers Morgan has taken to Twitter to characteristically behave like an utter tit today. Morgan, whose only physical accomplishment of note was to fall off a Segway and break two ribs shortly after saying "you'd...

Trump to take Twitter attacks on the road

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Donald Trump is to embark on a lengthy world tour in January, to ensure he can insult world leaders who don't follow him on Twitter. A White House spokesperson announced the news...

Zuckerberg assures Facebook have absolutely no information about your STD

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It's a sore subject that can become inflamed easily but there's an itch that needs to be scratched. In the wake of the fall out from the data protection controversy surrounding Facebook, under fire social...

Sexism Claim Over Parking Abuse

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A driver has defended parking his car across two spaces in a supermarket car park saying "no one would have batted an eyelid if I wasn't a bloke" Mark Ranley, from Doncaster, was criticised on...

Taking are speling back!

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The new Apple iOS update is to include a new autocorrect function for words such as muslin, briton and rasict. Computer giants and tax dodging bastards Apple have confirmed that the next update for its...
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