Politics

Ex Prime Minister David Cameron has today announced he will quit his role as an MP, which has surprised almost everybody as we'd all thought he had fucked off months ago. Cameron, who is most...

Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.

The American election process was thrown into confusion yesterday when the FBI moved into the Royal Clarence Hotel, Exeter, in search of a hidden email server supposedly belonging to Hillary Clinton.  The agents found computer...

Prime Minister Theresa May has announced that she won't intervene in David Cameron's scheme to reward all his mates with Honours. "Listen here," said an anonymous Number 10 spokesperson, "These things are decided by a...

Patriotic billionaire Brexiteer, Singapore resident and tax exile James Dyson has just bought a £26M bungalow in Singapore weeks after buying a Penthouse in Singapore for £43M. "Brexit is going to be brilliant for UK...

Theresa May was accused of muttering the words "fuck em, let em starve" in parliament on Wednesday. May appeared to mutter the words during a debate in the Commons about whether or not orphaned children...

In a last ditch attempt to find a "celebrity" to perform at Trump's Inauguration Scottish songstress and Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle (aka 'The Hairy Cornflake') has been approached by the president-soon-to-be's office...

In a miraculous change of heart Rochdale Online has decided to give the suspended MP Simon Danczuk a break. Editor Sandra Simonhater said "He did nowt wrong today" instead opting to report on Rochdale...

Following the announcement that Labour leadership challenger Owen Smith has promised to hold a second referendum on Brexit if he topples Jeremy Corbyn in the upcoming Labour leadership battle, local Rochdale UKIP supremo Mohammed Masud has...

Taking the mick out of Tories is fine but leave Corbyn alone, according to Frank Lennon, a Rochdale Momentum member. "The Tories are evil and are trying to destroy the poor," said Lennon, whose Facebook...

After Labour's marginal win in Stoke and devastating Loss in Copeland by elections, Left wing Labour supporters are calling for reselection of the constituency. Speaking to disappointed and angry Corbynistas, we got the following statements: "At first I thought...

A man claiming to represent Argentina has allegedly phoned the British prime minister and said for £1 billion they will pretend to invade the Islas Malvinas, if that will help Theresa May stay prime...

As part of the Brexit divorce settlement the EU has agreed to have Nigel Farage at weekends. In exchange for the financial settlement, believed to be several tens of billions of Euros, Mr Farage,...

Prime Minister Theresa May has heralded education reforms by telling UK schools that there will be "no return to the binary system of the past". The Rochdale Herald has this to say: 01000110 01110101 01100011 01101011...

The Daily Mail has accused the BBC of ignoring all the positive benefits Brexit has brought. In an editorial, the paper says that the BBC is deliberately ignoring the economic boom that is clearly going....

There was jubilation in Rochdale this afternoon as Clifford Savile Associates PLC announced their entry into the FTSE 250 for the first time. The news follows their recent multi-million pound crisis management contract with serial...