Relief for western buddhists as 5th noble truth says “Get on it!”
The world of Buddhism was flipped upside down today as a new addition to the original 4 noble truths was discovered in a monastery in Tibet.
The 5000 year old scripture stated a previously unseen...
Not enough young gay men commit suicide say arseholes in Anglican Synod
The utterly irrelevant small minded patronising pricks, bitches and utter arseholes in the Anglican Synod have said that not enough vulnerable young men kill themselves every year.
Government announces above-inflation pay rise for vital frontline MPs
Chancellor Philip Hammond responds to calls to offer above-inflation pay rises to public sector workers in Westminster, after a survey revealed that four out of ten MPs lose sleep because of financial anxiety.
The poll...
Daily Mail reveals that travelling on Virgin trains cures cancer
In a surprising u-turn, The Daily Mail has reported that travelling on Virgin trains cures cancer.
The report comes a week after it was reported by The Rochdale Herald that the Daily Mail was reporting...
Confederates, KKK and slave owners outraged by Appointment of Jeff Sessions to Attorney General
Confederates, slave owners and prominent members of the Ku Klux Klan have taken to Facebook to condemn Trump's nomination of Jeff Sessions to the office of Attorney General.
The Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal – 1,600 gifts bought in 48 hours
Two days ago we launched our Big Fat Secret Santa appeal with the wonderful guys and girls at NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People in Local Papers, BFNN and Tuckered to buy presents for...
Eastenders ‘Let’s Make a Success of Brexit’ Special to air every night
BBC smash hit soap 'Eastenders' has been ordered by the Culture Secretary to throw its weight behind Brexit and help make a success of it.
The initiative will see dead characters resurrected and retired cast...
Rising crime and falling numbers of police are incredible coincidence, insists Downing Street
Rising crime rates and the falling numbers of policemen on the streets are just an amazing coincidence and are in no way related, sources within Downing Street revealed today.
The news comes after the chief...
Satirist attempts to write Muhammad joke in bid to appease angry ‘Christians’
A writer for the internet's biggest Rochdale-based satire site, The Rochdale Herald, has spent the past 15 minutes trying to conjure up some sort of Muhammad joke in a bid to appease a bunch...
Peter Pan of Pop Peeves Proud Populace
Cliff Richards recently learned that South Yorkshire Police will not be pursuing historic sexual abuse claims against him, but he hasn't escaped the wrath of the good folk of Rochdale. The entire population is...
Anna Soubry appointed official Tory Deflector
After Miss Soubry's stellar and wholly forgettable performance for the remain campaign, she was deemed perfect for the role.
A tory deflector will typically take all of the flack for poor or unpopular government decisions...
16 Dead In Rochdale Women’s Institute Needle Exchange Hep B Outbreak
The Department of Health have launched an inquiry into an outbreak of Hepatitis B at a Rochdale WI knitting needle swap scheme after untreated cases resulted in the death of sixteen members.
Problems seemed to...
Beautiful young women on trial to be judged by ugly middle aged women in...
A new selection process has been announced for assigning judges to trials, taking into account both gender and aesthetics. This move will see all beautiful young women judged in future by ugly middle-aged women,...
Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal – 2,329 Gifts bought in four days
Four days ago we launched our Big Fat Secret Santa appeal with the wonderful guys and girls at NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People in Local Papers and Tuckered to buy presents for children...
Jesus to have birthday party in August
Jesus Christ has gone on the record to say that he is absolutely sick and tired of relatives and friends buying him joint birthday and Christmas presents.
Mike Hookem’s Dad officially bigger than Steven Woolfe’s Dad
Following an altercation in Strasbourg yesterday between two fully grown adult men, Mike Hookem and Steven Wolfe, UKIP released a statement saying;
