Other News

Idiots across America who voted for Trump because he told them he was really good at doing deals are surprised by the news he hasn't been able to do a deal with a Bruce Springsteen tribute band.

A man who distinctly said that he’d “deal with” student debt during an interview with the NME is curious to know why everybody was under the impression that he planned to deal with student...

Since June 23 Brexiters led by an enraged Nigel Farage haven't stopped moaning about the majority vote for Britain to remain in EU. "I don't care if it was 8% or 80%!" fumed Mr. Farage. "We...

A man in Lancashire this evening accidentally turned on his television this evening to see Donald Trump leading Hillary Clinton in the polls in North Carolina and now definitely won't sleep.

Liberal democrat leadership candidate "SIR" Vince Cable has been left looking a plum strawberry fool after his claim that Britain was running out of strawberries because of a shortage of migrant fruit pickers was...

Recent medical studies have found a direct link between xenophobic thoughts and the rampant outbreak of Nuttalls in the U.K. Closely resembling a haemorrhoid, a Nuttall is a pink, puss filled boil that can appear...

Eurosceptic holidaymakers are swapping Corfu for Cornwall, Lanzarote for Llandudno. British travel agents report that Brits are going to UK destinations they never knew existed. "We couldn't go to Paris, obvs," says Frances Horrible, "so...

Tony Blair yesterday announced that he intended to fill a massive hole and that after that he'd return to British politics. In an interview he described Theresa May as "that fucking usless woman" and Jeremy...

There was anger in parliament last night as the government narrowly defeated a motion by the Labour Party to end the cap on public sector pay rises by 323 votes to 309. The government's narrow...

It was announced this morning by a genuinely startled press that international rating agency Moody’s has downgraded the UK credit status to junk after finally realising who is in charge of the country. The UK’s...

British holidaymakers and Brexit voters on their way to France had the opportunity to learn what the term "French border control" actually means over the last couple of days. The French, who are famous for...

The voting public was aghast today to discover that a career politician has been lying and spinning the facts through the media in order to promote his own agenda. In the first time in the...

?Staff arriving for work at the new Rochdale Waitrose were surprised to find a car park full of Range Rovers and a queue of concerned looking women at the door waiting for the store to open. “Initially...

The Government has been urged to hold a referendum on euthanasia following research that showed that 52% of voters would support the introduction of euthanasia to the UK. A survey of Britons has found that...

Owen Smith is not a man who flinches from an unnecessary challenge out of a risk of public humiliation. In fact, so ready is he to debase himself in public he’s likely to challenge Jeremy...

A man and a woman managed to see news stories shared on Facebook today without thinking it proved what they already believe.  Duncan Merchant from Rochdale, 35, and Chloe S Patton from Leicester, 44, saw...