Nature

Priti Patel, Minister for whatever the heck it is she does has been one of the first Government Ministers to congratulate Boris Johnson and Carrie Symonds on the birth of their son. Ms Patel, who...

Sheffield Council has been forced to declare their belief in a flat earth after applying the same statistical analysis to a recent on-line poll of a group of Sheffield residents on the shape of...

While spending a good portion of his weekly income on the Euromillions, Mr. Garry Lee Shaw complained about the fifth or even sixth time that week that he’d seen the exact same pigeon outside...

A group of house spiders has launched a campaign aimed at reducing the number of arachnids being swallowed by sleeping humans. 

It transpires that North Sea Oil Revenues now contribute £60Million to the Scottish revenue pot, down from almost £13Billion a couple of years ago because you now sell a barrel of North Sea Oil...

A dog who has spent the last hour and a half peering longingly through the patio doors at the garden is now peering longingly into the living room from the garden after spending fifteen...

A pigeon chess grand master from Rochdale has been telling us how he finds it a embarrassing to be included with Boris Johnson in a metaphor about Brexit. The metaphor appeared on Rochdale resident, Board's...

Top food scientists say they are 'very close' to successfully breeding a turkey with a cranberry bush. The new 'turkberry' hybrid bush-bird could be on our Christmas dinner tables as early as next year, if...

A turkey on a Norfolk farm has been spared slaughter after claiming to identify as a majestic bird of prey. "Once I found a tin of gold spray paint round the back of the shed,...

A Balmoral based deer has spoken out after being run down by the heir to the British throne. Dougal Hornhead spoke to the Herald after seeking veterinary care. "Aye, I wiz jist out for a run...

Noted elderly naturist David Attenborough was cock-a-hoop yesterday when he announced the discovery of the first new species of great ape for many years. Mr Attenborough announced "We have certainly discovered a new great ape....

The BBC has issued an apology after leaked footage of tonight's 'Blue Planet II' revealed that NONE of the animals featured will be wearing a Remembrance Day poppy.  The 'Coral Reefs' episode due to be aired this...

Following the UK release of Pokemon Go ten days ago, several prominent spokespersons for leading UK religious organisations have spoken out, condemning the game as being opposed to the basic tenets of their religion. Facebook...

A Tsunami threat has been issued for the East coast of England after a man who hasn't had a shit for a week finally found success in the downstairs loo. Findley Leigh-Pseudonym, a newspaper...

We to need press on with the solution,  said Theressa May when questioned before all the MP's went on their jollies, leaving the country to run better by itself. "Et jus' don't werk" said...

As we take in the wonderful news of the large increase in the number of elephants across the south of Africa, Zimbabwe has called for the legalization of the ivory trade. Zimbabwe, famous for its...