Education

Make your own Original Trumpkin! Have you ever wanted to scare the bejeezus out of your neighbours on Halloween? Finally you have you chance with The Rochdale Herald's original Trumpkin! Step 1. Download the following template and...

Scientists have devised a new unit to measure inactivity that they're calling the Corbyn. Professor Frederick Seddon of Rochdale College told us, "We've been trying for some time to come up with a measure of...

A Rochdale primary school has come under fire from parents for casting a 9 year old Palestinian immigrant as the virgin Mary in the school's annual nativity play. Hanna, whose Christian Palestinian family travelled to...

People who are quite happy to have their kids going to schools where the armed forces recruit, monarchy is glorified and the status quo of modern free market capitalism is drummed into their...

Leading language experts are calling for a change in the classification of the word 'trump'. Traditionally, it has been used as: a term for flatulence a term in the cards game of Bridge a term...

A primary school has become the center of a row when it taught religion to transgender pupils. St Andgreavsey's primary school faced a parents revolt after the largely transgender pupils were taught that...

In a shock announcement this morning, that surprised no one, a spokes-stool for Isis (other names are available) claimed credit for the proposed funding changes to schools in England. "Our education policy sub-committee has...

Prime Minister Theresa May has heralded education reforms by telling UK schools that there will be "no return to the binary system of the past". The Rochdale Herald has this to say: 01000110 01110101 01100011 01101011...

Facebook was in chaos today after the soaring popularity of the Spell Check a Racist (S.C.A.R.) page caused a stack overflow causing the entire network to grind to a halt. "Sadly, we had no choice...

As part of the government's recently launched Fu*k Business initiative, the University of Burnley is offering a 5 Year degree course in fruit picking, including a year of 'On The Job' training. Ian Jaggs, speaking...

Jeremy Corbyn will today lay out his manifesto pledge to make dropping out of university courses affordable for everyone. He will tell supporters that, under the current Tory Government doing four terms of a Media...

Parents up and down the country have thrown their support behind the Conservatives today after details emerged of a radical new plan to abolish school holidays and send children to school for 12 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days of the year.

The editor of The Rochdale Herald was left horrified aboard a flight to Rhodes yesterday after reading an article in a copy of The Telegraph he "found". "Most undergrads can't tell the difference between Burgundy and...

Children have been told that GCSE's will be of no use in the coming land war with the robots. The education Secretary Justine Greening has revealed her plan to back what she calls "more realistic...

Great Britain was disappointed to learn that she has completely failed GCSE ecomomics, business studies, history, French, German and Spanish today. While GCSE pass rates have generally been on the rise Britain managed to completely...