Crime

The Home Office has confirmed that British criminals will now be allowed to commit crimes in a 'specific and limited way' following the government's recent abandonment of the rule of international law. As long as...

Conservative plans to abolish the Serious Fraud Office has absolutely nothing to do with the investigations into rich Conservative supporters,said a spokesgrunt for the party today. Current investigations into the alleged attempts to rig Libor...

A former chocolate delivery man broke into dozens of women’s homes over a 50 year period leaving unwanted chocolates and creepy handwritten notes. Gary Myers, 76 from Middleton in Lancashire, was jailed for 30 months after...

Abigail Walsh was just 7 years old when she went missing from a caravan site, on a family holiday in Blackpool, 10 years ago. Her parents, Mick and Janice, left Abigail and her two siblings;...

Things took a turn for the decidedly unpleasant at the plush new Waitrose store in Rochdale's upmarket Shawclough Road area this afternoon as a spate of panic buying quickly escalated into bitter violence, looting...

The question of the identity of the serial killer known as ‘The Whitechapel Murderer’, ‘Leather Apron’ or, most famously Jack the Ripper has been hotly contested since the culprit first brought terror to the...

After around 30 people were injured, many more shocked and people consequently feeling terrified, New York officials are keen to point out that the act of... er, the act is deliberate but not related...

News is just in that spot poll of everybody in the UK has revealed today that the UK's favourite synonym for taking a dump is now "off to free Tommy Robinson." According to experts at...

The beloved obesity peddler Ronald McDonald was found dead in the street in the early hours of this morning. The cause of death is unknown but locals believe he was beaten to death due...

 Amber Rudd is set to give evidence to a commons committee on the state of the inquiry into child sexual abuse in place of Dame Lowell Goddard, who didn't have the balls to turn...

The time travelling duo, Marty McFly and Dr Emmett Brown, are currently being held in the custody of Sheriff James Strickland in Hill Valley, Northern California. Strickland said; "We pulled over a Delorean doing 87mph on the...

The United States was relieved to hear that the explosion that ripped through NYC earlier in the week wasn't the act of a lone wolf or somebody with a mental illness but probably a...

We at the Rochdale Herald really liked this headline but couldn't think of a way of making even slightly believable. What follows is some made up tripe about a load of crap that makes no...

Men up and down the UK will now be sleeping with one eye open and replacing all the knives in the house with plastic picnic cutlery after the acquittal of Helen Titchener of Ambridge,...

A new selection process has been announced for assigning judges to trials, taking into account both gender and aesthetics. This move will see all beautiful young women judged in future by ugly middle-aged women,...

Causes of knife crime confirmed to be poor choices of dead victims As knife crime continues to plague the streets of the capital, a bleeding edge study by Rochdale University has identified the top five...