Francis Aston
Fact checked by Snopes; Plagiarised by Andrew Neil; Nancy Sinatra's favourite Rochdale satirist; sued by Chris Froome and winner of the 1922 Nobel Prize for Chemistry.*
*Not all of these necessarily true.
Venus Williams says most recent car insurance quote inspired her Wimbledon run
Venus Williams has revealed that she was inspired to her Wimbledon final appearance by her most recent car insurance quote.
Speaking after finishing runner up,...
Donald Trump Jr upset by chants of ‘lock him up’ from Donald Trump Snr
Donald Trump Jr has allegedly complained that President Trump keeps chanting 'lock him up' at him.
Trump Junior made a complaint to a White House...
Scientists prove warm prosecco only explanation for Love Island
A scientific study has been released that shows that Love Island can only be explained by warm prosecco.
Dr Frederick Seddon of Rochdale college told...
Boris overheard telling King Felipe of Spain ‘NO GIVO BACKO, CAPICHE’ whilst pointing at...
Boris Johnson has unveiled his diplomatic plan to engage with King Felipe and Queen Letizia over Brexit negotiations at a state meal.
Johnson told the...
Donald Trump denies links to Donald Trump Jnr
Donald Trump has denied ever meeting Donald Trump Jr. The denial comes after it was revealed by Trump Jr that he had met Russian Natalia...
Whitehouse denies denying things that were denied last week
The Whitehouse press corps was today left totally baffled by the latest denial issued by a Whitehouse press spokesperson.
The denial was in response to...
Touching scenes as Rooney reunited with hair transplant donor
Footage has been revealed of the touching scenes when Wayne Rooney was reunited with his hair donor.
The meeting took place on the rock of...
Champagne socialist accidentally reveals cost of scrapping tuition fees after drinking warm prosecco
A Rochdale champagne socialist has accidentally revealed that the cost of scrapping tuition fees would be £100bn. Anthony Taylor-Twyford revealed the cost at a...
Anarchists angered at police refusal to follow rules
A group of Rochdale anarchists have been telling the Herald about the treatment they received at the hands of the German police at the...
Electric shock therapy recharges your batteries, says sadistic boss
The boss of a Rochdale mobile phone tech support company, Globally Integrated Mobile Phone Solutions, has been telling the Herald how electric shock therapy...
Daily Mail accuses BBC of not being impartial on Brexit
The Daily Mail has accused the BBC of ignoring all the positive benefits Brexit has brought.
In an editorial, the paper says that the BBC...
My missile is bigger than your missile Trump tells Kim Jong Un
Donald Trump has started a Twitter row with Kim Jong Un over the size of their missiles.
Kim had yesterday claimed he possesses a missile...
Buzz Aldrin says not punching Trump is his greatest achievement
Buzz Aldrin has suprised many today by saying that his greatest achievement is not punching Donald Trump. Mr Aldrin attended an event where the...
Survey finds UK’s pub chat and sense of humour at risk of extinction
Social scientists have revealed a study that shows a correlation between the decline in the British sense of humour and decline in pub chat.
Dr...
Rochdale man abandons Marxism after winning £10 on lottery
A Rochdale resident has been explaining how winning £10 on the lottery has made him re-evaluate his position on Marxism.
Shea Bukharin told the Herald,...
Love Island Johnny reveals ‘I have the clap’ as bosses rebrand hit show ‘Syphilis...
Love island viewers were last night in shock after it was revealed the island is to be transformed into a syphilis colony.
The revelations came...
