Following months of political turmoil in the UK and the shining example of incompetence that is the brexit negotiations, the political landscape is now undergoing further stress following an annoucement exclusively revealed to The Rochdale Herald earlier today.
In an unprecedented move, the Houses of Parliament are going to be used to host one of the more unusual events on the sporting calendar.
Mrs Felicity Katt-Pierson, the world famous organiser of this and many other competitions told us how they had come to choose the House of Commons as the venue for the 2017 UK Cat Herding Championships.
“We needed somewhere in early November that was used to noisy, chaotic and ridiculously unorganised activity,” she told us. “It was an absolute no brainer that we would pick the House of Commons.
“We asked them months ago but due to the antiquated way they go about things we had to wait whilst the application was approved by various Quangos and civil service departments. Meetings kept being postponed due to no shows and differences of opinion were aired. There were a lot of mixed messages and some downright sneaky behaviour.”
She explained that there had been further delays to a decision. “Then a vote took place where half of them voted and the other half abstained to make sure they didn’t look like losers but then lost. Then some ridiculous ceremony with some geezer with a stick showed up, shouting obscenities, before it finally got signed off. It was a total shambles but did illustrate what a perfect venue it would be for the competition”
Mrs Katt-Pierson was hopeful that she will be able to hold more events at Westminster in the future if its a success.
“Lots on the horizon if this goes well, we have fog knitting world championships, the chicken lips collectors convention, tartan paint exhibition. Loads.”
If the cat herding isn’t a success then there is a contingency: “We expect the event to go without a hitch due to its suitability but in the event we run over time without a winner then we will carry out a controlled explosion, which shouldnt cause amy harm to the animals or damage to the building, what could possibly go wrong?”
The competition is scheduled to finish on November 5th.
