A bloke who gave a rabble rousing speech to a bunch of Nazis in Germany has put out a plea on social media asking people to please stop comparing him to Hitler.

The man, who can’t be named for legal reasons, was invited to the event by the granddaughter of Hitler’s finance minister.

“I don’t know why people keep comparing me and my politics to Adolf Hitler.” The chap who gave the speech to a bunch of fascists led by a woman who said border guards should shoot child immigrants to deter them told The Herald.

“I’m nothing like the bloke. I’m no good at drawing and I’ve gassed hardly any Jews at all. I really don’t know how people can make the comparison.” He told us from a German Renaissance citadel in Berlin full of far right German fascists.

“I don’t even have a moustache, I’m nothing like him at all. These accusations are ludicrous.” The man whose teacher at Dulwich College described him as having “publicly professed racist and fascist views.”

“I’m not even a vegetarian, everybody knows Adolf didn’t eat meat. These comparisons are just ridiculous and last time I checked I had both of my balls.”

The bloke, who wishes to remain anonymous in case his mum finds out he’s been going to Germany to give populist speeches to rooms full of racist, far right spunktrumpets, is said to be not entirely unhappy with the Hitler comparisons.

“Apparently he was bit of a fan back in his day and used to march around his village in Sussex singing Hitler youth songs.

No idea how anybody could be drawing these comparisons though.”

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.