Business

The age old question of trying to persuade employees to continue to care about work on a Friday has vexed employers for decades. A popular choice is appearing to tolerate diversity, of clothing, in...

The Secretary of State for International Trade, Liam Fox, was thrilled to announce this week the first trade agreement for a post-Brexit Britain. The historic deal with Mexico’s Sinaloa Cartel, the world’s most powerful drug...

The Shard in London is nearing completion, according to developers. Once finished, it will stand at 310m and will be the tallest building in the United Kingdom and the 105th tallest in the world. Construction began...

Chocolatiers are responding to Theresa May's ire this afternoon after "Great" was dropped from "Great Britain " in a number of confectionary products. From now on "Great Britain's Parliament Boiled Lollies" will simply be "Britain's...

The Senior Outsourcing Revenue Maximisation Vice President for KPMG, the 'big four?' auditor under fire for signing off Carillion's accounts months before its collapse, has pleaded ignorance to the £2.6Billion pensions shortfall and eye...

Reading aloud small words from a Steve Bannon script, President Trump welcomed Prime Minister of Japan, Shinzo Abe, to the famous White House.  After he let go of the stunned Prime Minister’s hand following a...

Online megatrader Amazon has issued a cease and desist order against the Moon, obliging the satellite to end its intended traverse between the Sun and the earth, lawyers acting for the company announced. According to...

KFC has opened more of its outlets in the UK despite running completely out of chicken.

Employees from a Rochdale conservatory company have been explaining how a new employee is definitely up to something. Simon Simpson started on Monday and told us, "It's been good so far. Everyone is really...

The last person who is yet to be investigated whether or not they were mis-sold PPI has been found, bewildered, but alive.  After years of searching by PPI claims companies the lone man, Nigel Colinson,...

The Royal Bank of Scotland has today announced losses of 7 billion pounds in the fiscal year of 2016. The Bank has been running at a loss of several billion a year since the global...

ISIS and all the member states of the United Nations have broadly condemned the British parcel delivery firm and courier service Yodel for crimes against humanity.

The bank of England and Royal Mint announced today that the new pound coin that entered into circulation this week is made using the blubber of baby seals. After much controversy from vegans, and middle-class...

Startling news reached us today that a lost tribe of warehouse workers has been found "really fit" and well in an Amazon 'fulfilment centre' near Tewkesbury. The tribe is thought to consist of approximately 75...

Communities in Rochdale were reeling this morning as more news of impending financial doom hit the papers, and the pockets of hard working job seekers and alcoholics alike. "I can't believe this is happening." Said...

Some people in the Conservative Party don’t have blind and unquestioning faith in dogmatic free market bullshit, a rich bloke who charges people extortionate rates for power has claimed. Iain Conn (honestly, that’s not a...