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NEWSFLASH – Trump withdraws from Election

On the eve of the US Presidential Election Donald Trump has dramatically pulled out of the running. Don Trump, 58 and owner of Streamline Taxis on the Oldham Road in Rochdale, has announced that he...

Americans horrified to learn what the word ‘amendment’ means

As hillbillies, rednecks and evangelical Christian right wing crackpots celebrate the last thrashings of America's hold on reality with the nomination of Pinochet-a-like Donald Trump to the Republican Party presidential ticket, ground shaking revelations...
Donald Trump has a gold leaf living room yet tells the government he doesn't pay tax because you would waste it

Man with solid gold living room tells government “I don’t pay tax because you...

A man who owns a solid gold living room reportedly told one hundred million of his closest friends that he doesn't pay Tax in case the government squanders it. Mr Drumpf from New York has...
Quantum Leap

Dr Samuel Beckett stuck in 2016 after failing to ‘put right what once went...

In the mid 1990's Physicist Dr Samuel Beckett blazed a trail by stepping into his Quantum Leap accelerator and vanishing. In actual fact he woke to find himself trapped in the past, facing mirror images that...
Ferrero Roche

Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’

Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight after the newly elected despot Donald J. Trump's controversial Tweet...
Donald Trump

Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration

There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event. The demagogue was able to confound the polls by attracting the popular vote of those...
My Struggle

Donald Trump autobiography ‘My Struggle’ set for November release

A spokesman for Donald Trump has announced that the eagerly anticipated Trump autobiography is set for release in early October ahead of the November US Presidential Election. The book, titled "My Struggle" will focus largely...

Donald Trump hires Hugo Boss to design new ‘Cabinet Uniform’

The controversial decision to hire Hugo Boss was openly discussed by The President-elect, Donald J. Trump, on Good Morning America yesterday during a catwalk segment. When asked about his favourite clothing label, Mr. Trump, apparently...
Trump Supporters

Trump recorded saying “Trump Supporters are fat, racist white trash”

‘Rumours that Donald Trump described his legions of supporters as "obese trailer park trash" and "uneducated fucking idiots" are yet to be confirmed.
Trump furious to learn Farage isn't 'King of England'

Trump furious to learn Farage isn’t ‘King of England’

President-elect, Donald Trump, learned that Nigel Farage is not the King of England and that the monarch is in fact a female, on an interview with FOX news earlier today A visibly shaken Mr. Trump...

Donald Trump scraps border wall after learning the word “ladder”

Donald Trump has sensationally dropped his controversial border wall plan, a key election promise, after seeing one of his Mexican labourers use a ladder for the first time.
Melania Trump

Melania did not have sex with horrible old men for money admits Daily Mail

The Daily Mail have gone on the record today to say that Melania Trump did not and never has had sex with any horrible old men for money. "Melania has definitely never had sex with...

Trump rushed to John Hopkins with severe burns

Donald Trump is said to be in a stable but critical condition this morning after being rushed to hospital suffering from self inflicted third degree burns to almost half of his body. Fact checking website...

I wouldn’t rape a fat woman, I have standards – says Trump

Thousands of Republican voters suffered serious head injuries yesterday after face palming themselves really hard during a Trump Rally.
Sean Spicer

Sean Spicer suspended from Labour Party over Hitler comments

Tom Watson has announced this morning that the White House press secretary, Sean Spicer is to be investigated by the Labour Party for anti-Semitic remarks and bringing the Labour Party into disrepute. Spicer, who is...

Latin America overdoses on Irony as CIA complains Russia rigged US election

Thousands of people are feared dead in Central and Latin America this week after literally laughing their heads off at the news that the CIA is complaining that Russia may have rigged the US...

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