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Donald Trump has a gold leaf living room yet tells the government he doesn't pay tax because you would waste it

Man with solid gold living room tells government “I don’t pay tax because you...

A man who owns a solid gold living room reportedly told one hundred million of his closest friends that he doesn't pay Tax in case the government squanders it. Mr Drumpf from New York has...

Melbourne businessman treated for shock after discovering he’s a racist

John Ewing, who runs a café in a southeast suburb of Melbourne, was a participant in the recent poll that found 49 per cent of Australians support a ban on Muslim immigration. 60 percent of...

Mexico to start digging tunnels, at America’s expense

Mexico declared today that it would start digging a series of tunnels along its border with America, so millions of hard working Mexicans can get to work faster.  The plan is to save time and...

Donald Trump to appear on Jeremy Kyle Show

Jeremy Kyle was said to be jubilant this morning after securing an exclusive appearance by Donald Trump. The show which is titled "Five children by Three Women" will almost certainly feature Donald Trump taking a...

French now too lazy to strike

In an unusual turn of events, the French have today declared that they can't even be arsed to have a proper strike, and that apathy is all it takes to create cross channel misery.  Instead...

Quackpot fundamentalist and friend of dictators finally canonised by paedophiles

Mother Theresa of Calcutta became Saint Theresa yesterday in a small ceremony in the Vatican. Saint Theresa, who passed through Rochdale on her way to Dublin in 1928, will be remembered by millions of...

Hundreds feared dead in Australian irony explosion

In an unprecedented change of heart, the adviser who recommended to ex-Prime Minister, Julia Gillard, that she resume offshore processing, has now declared it should be abandoned.  Paris Aristotle, ironically sharing the name as the...

Sex Workers to sue Daily Mail for comparing them to Melania Trump

Millions of sex workers are suing right wing rag, The Daily Mail, after they referred to Melania Trump as a “former sex worker” in an article about her immigration status. “Listen, despite us providing an...

Trump in Mexican standoff

Donald Trump today paid a flying visit to Mexico for talks with President Pena Nieto.  Amongst his entourage was his new Foreign Policy adviser Jeremy Clarkson, hired in line with Trump's current policy of comedy...

French Beekeeper stung to death after Police force her to remove Beekini

France was in shock today after a French beekeeper was stung to death in a tragic apiculture accident in the South of France. The news comes just days after Marie Abeille was arrested by the...

Picture yourself in their shoes

A picture of Omran Daqneesh, the five year old boy who was pulled from the rubble that used to be his home in Aleppo, Syria yesterday, has hit the news media by storm and...

KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump

In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku Klux Klan, is polling better amongst black voters in his...

Texas commemorates first mass shooting by giving students guns to take to school

To celebrate the 50th anniversary of the world's inaugural mass shooting event at the University of Austin in Texas law makers have passed a very special law to mark the occasion. On August 2nd 1966...
My Struggle

Donald Trump autobiography ‘My Struggle’ set for November release

A spokesman for Donald Trump has announced that the eagerly anticipated Trump autobiography is set for release in early October ahead of the November US Presidential Election. The book, titled "My Struggle" will focus largely...

ISIS claim responsibility for the sinking of lost city of Atlantis

After claiming that the recent murder of 84 people in Nice, a spokesman for the so-called Islamic State have issued a list of other things that “soldiers of IS” have apparently been responsible for. On...

Rumours are circulating that Boris Johnson was the “brains” behind an attempted coup in...

Our source from Eurasian think tank Ata Matters informed us that the Etonian fop masterminded the attempted takeover after his coup d'etat of the UK was scuppered by reptilian Pob-alike, Michael Gove. "Boris believes he's supposed...

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