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Charlie Stuart

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Vicar attacked for dropping Easter from Easter Sunday

A 45 year-old Rochdale man is recovering in hospital today after being attacked for not referring to this coming Sunday as ‘Easter Sunday’. The victim,...

United Airlines passengers have it easy, complain Ryanair passengers

Following reports of a United Airlines passenger being violently removed from an overbooked flight on Sunday, angry Ryanair passengers have demanded to know why...

Disney Confirm Little Mermaid Killed By North Korean Missile Launch

Within the past few minutes the Walt Disney Company has released a statement confirming that Ariel, the Little Mermaid, was killed during Wednesday's North...

Liam Fox Seeks Trade Deal With ISIS

International Trade Secretary Liam Fox will fly into Iraq later today in the hope of securing a trade deal with the so-called 'Islamic State'. Fox...
Sturgeon

Will of the Scottish People Revealed to be Sturgeon’s Imaginary Friend

An SNP insider has revealed that Nicola Sturgeon’s repeated use of the phrase ‘Will of the Scottish People’ is actually a reference to her...

Local Liberal Claims To Only Visit Daily Mail Website For The Tits And Ass

Rochdale liberal Gerard Sutherland has told his wife that he only visits the Daily Mail website for the Z-list 'celebrity' tits and ass, and...

Cats claim they definitely won’t eat your face, probably

In the event of you suffering a serious accident that leaves you dead or incapacitated, your cat, definitely won’t eat your face, probably, a...

The Sun to relaunch as Colouring Book

The UK’s second best-selling hate rag, The Sun, is to be relaunched as a colouring book.  As of next week, the Murdoch-owned ‘newspaper’ will cease...
Piers Morgan

Piers Morgan to be face of ‘Free The Ballbag’ campaign

Piers Morgan has been revealed as the new face of men's rights campaign 'Free the Ballbag'. Inspired by the feminist 'Free The Nipple' movement, the...

Iain Duncan Smith appointed to North Korean Cabinet

Within the last hour, the North Korean Central News Agency has confirmed the appointment of Iain Duncan Smith as its new ‘Secretary for the...

Britons Now Incapable Of Making Any Decision Without A Referendum

The majority of British people are now incapable of making a decision without first holding a referendum, according to a study published today. Researchers...

Steve Bannon Torn Over Best Way To F*ck The Disabled

Following reports that Donald Trump will no longer repeal an Executive Order protecting LGBT rights, White House insiders have revealed that his Chief Strategist,...

Sean Spicer announces Foetuses included in Trump Travel Ban

Within the last hour the White House has announced plans to extend its controversial travel ban to unborn foetuses.  Trump’s Press Secretary, Sean Spicer, confirmed that the...

Assange ready to be extradited from his own arse

Julian Assange has confirmed that he is willing to be extradited from his own arse following Barack Obama’s decision to commute the sentence of US Army...

Trump Team Dismiss 9 Year-Old ‘Body Swap’ Claims

A spokesperson for Donald Trump has described as “absurd” claims being made by a Wisconsin couple that the President-elect is actually their 9 year-old son.  Mike and...

Russian Government Denies Hacking Rochdale Herald

The Russian Government has reacted angrily towards allegations that it was responsible for hacking UK news site The Rochdale Herald. The Herald, which is...

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