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Nosmo King

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French Military

French Head of Military resigns after Macron cuts £1bn from White Flag Budget

General Pierre de Villiers today sensationally quit as Head of the French Military in a row over cuts to the French White Flag budget. General...
Sad Man

Record complaints at Ofcom as latest episode of ‘Tits and Swords’ contains no tits

Switchboards at UK TV regulators Ofcom were jammed last night after the eagerly anticipated first episode of the new series of Game of Thrones...
Bully

Calling bullies bullies is bullying say bullied bullies

Support groups representing bullies are calling for the term bully to be banned. They claim it is a negative and pejorative phrase and leaves...
John Inverdale

Konta tipped to be “a solid 6” when John Inverdale’s 2017 Sexist Gaffes are...

Finals Weekend at The Championships in Wimbledon is fast approaching and that can only mean one thing…the eagerly awaited 2017 Sexist Gaffes list from...
Ross and Rachel

Chilcot Report reveals Ross and Rachel WERE on a break

With the kind of speed, thoroughness and ability to keep his finger on Britain’s zeitgeist that has come to be expected from him, the...
Theresa May

Lessons not learned for out of touch May as she fails to show up...

Critics have jumped on to Theresa May claiming that she is out of touch and still has not learned the lessons of the recent...
Donald Trump

President Trump tells reporter to ‘lick my donkey balls’ and denies Donald Trump jnr...

Donald Trump mounted a sustained attack on the media during a fiery and at times chaotic news conference today, aggressively denying that Donald Trump...

Corbyn denies ‘pineapple on pizza’ allegations during lunch with genocide denier

Jeremy Corbyn today strenuously denied having pineapple on the pizza he shared with Assad Supporting, Genocide Denier and all around Russian puppet Marcus Papadopoulos....
Diane Abbott

Diane Abbott suspended from Labour Party for calling Tory Front Bench ‘crackers’

Labour Shadow Home Secretary, Diane Abbott, has been suspended from the party after it emerged she was accused of using a racist slur during...
Hippies Hippy

Cornwall in Crisis as more middle class hippies leaving than arriving since Brexit

Cornwall is in crisis as studies show, for the first time in a generation, more middle-class old hippies are leaving than arriving. One local, Anni...
T20

Cricketers injured as dyslexic Anarchists riot at T20

Two Yorkshire cricketers and a number of spectators were injured last night as nearly 200 dyslexic anarchists rioted at the T20. Similar riots took place...

Love Island Special – John Terry sacks Agent after he asked to join “that...

John Terry, the legendary back door man and occasional footballer, has sacked his Agent after finding himself trapped in a 1 year contract at...
Man on Toilet

Theresa May accuses Corbyn of using ‘Fake Poos’ to attack the Government and damage...

A damning Government report, and therefore it's Theresa May saying it, has accused men, and therefore by inclusion Jeremy Corbyn, of using Fake Poos to attack...
nurses

Nurses threaten to go on saving lives if public sector pay cap isn’t removed

Nurses have upped the ante with the Government by sensationally threatening to continue to act in a professional fashion in their ongoing dispute over...
Sunglasses

‘Men only wear sunglasses to check out other women, like at weddings’ say Scientists

Claims have been made in a startling report that men only wear sunglasses so that they can check out other women without their wives...

Scottish Windfarm to re-open after summer recess

Nicola Sturgeon is to give a massive boost to renewable energy later today by droning on about the "way forward for Scotland" and as...

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