Julian Assange has tonight been giving a speech outlining his plans for the weekend.
Mr Assange who, was told today by a Swedish prosecutor that rape charges have been dropped made the speech outside the Ecuadorian embassy.
In the speech Mr Assange said,”This is an important victory. This weekend I plan to have a quiet weekend in. Tonight I will watch some television, maybe order out for a pizza, get a couple of cans of Quitena Pale and catch up on Downton Abbey.”
Mr Assange went on to express his excitement that the Ecuadorian embassy has a new carpet with a pattern of interconnected squares and triangles. “I intend to see how many squares there are and investigate the geometry of the triangles. Afterwards, who knows, maybe I’ll do some work on my cross stitch. I’ve almost finished the life size replica of the Bayeux Tapestry. Maybe I could make a start on my Game of Thrones series one.”
Mr Assange will also catch up on missed episodes of Kliffor, Ecuador’s answer to The Cosby show. He revealed he plans to watch the Premiership on Saturday afternoon having become an ardent Hull City fan. Mr Assange is a fan of the culture of Hull and will kick back with The House Martins on Sunday morning whilst hoovering to Rizzle Kicks in the afternoon.
Mr Assange also revealed that he intends to apply to go on Mastermind and answer questions on his specialist subject, Heartbeat 2002-2008.
Mr Assange closed his speech by saying, “Who knows, Monday I may pull a sickie and make it a three day weekend.
