The fact that Americans have used a big fuck-off bomb when North Korea and Trump are engaged in a major sabre rattle is just coincidence, the Whitehouse has claimed.

“We realise that the timing of this looks exactly like us flopping out our cock and yelling ‘GET A LOAD OF THIS, KIMMY-BOY! I GOT YA SPICY DOG NOODLES RIGHT HERE, MOTHERFUCKER!’ rather loudly,” said Sean Spicer, “but the fact that we used our SECOND biggest bunker busting bomb at this precise moment is utterly coincidental.”

The huge bomb was, insists Trump today, totally appropriate for use against twelve tunneling mullahs in a rabbit warren.

“Any suggestion that we might be saying ‘Oi Sungun or whatever, our bombs work’ is just fake news although I admit that North Korean bunkers wouldn’t stand a chance against our MOAB.”

The Korean leader was unavailable to comment but a spokesman did promise to give us some details later if we could smuggle him some Imodium and a few rolls of Andrex.

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When the aeons of war left the gods dead and the universe decimated, a single duck rose from the ashes and stood for justice and freedom! It wasn't me, that duck, but we look quite bit alike.