After a petition to stop the orange Hitler visiting the Queen passed 1.7 million signatures, the tyrannical dictator offered to meet the new President in secret.

Hair Force 1 arrived at Buckingham Palace just after 3 am today.

A Trump aide (not a laxative), who wishes to remain anonymous, said;

“He (Trump) got out of the plane and immediately into his limousine, which sped him straight to Buckingham Palace.  The President looked the palace up and down before kissing Queen Elizabeth II on the forehead and telling her that the palace was ‘a right shit hole’.  He then offered to pay for the repairs.”

The Queen reportedly made a swift exit leaving Prince Phillip and President Trump to spend the night happily drinking and discussing ‘ragheads’ and ‘spics’.

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