Leading language experts are calling for a change in the classification of the word ‘trump’.

Traditionally, it has been used as:

  • a term for flatulence
  • a term in the cards game of Bridge
  • a term for being above competitor’s or other offers.

“We need to stop using ‘trump’ for anything but describing the worst, most terrible things imaginable, it’s worse than the cunt word now.” explained linguistics expert, Prof. Bunty Calls, PhD.

“We have to get kids saying ‘fart’, ‘guff’, ‘boff’ and ‘parp’ again.  Last year, the OED made a list of swear words and graded them and this word wasn’t even on the list.  Now it’s risen to the top of the motherfucking, cunting thing”

He went on to add that the word “used to describe breaking wind in a hilarious and almost musical way but, since this fuckbungle turned up, it terrifies people.

“Hopefully not using it will help us get through the dark times whilst this cunt nugget is in power”