A government source told us yesterday that  robot eyed shitkicker Jeremy Hunt has decided to take a more philosophical approach to the NHS crisis.

Dr Steph O’Scope said “I think he’s reading Zen & The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, or pretending to. He is spouting old clichés and minimalist ideas. He told me that the less money he gives the already creaking and demotivated service the more it’ll improve.”

“He keeps telling worried NHS staff to Zen out. I wish he would Zen off to be honest. I saw him with a copy of the Emperor’s New Clothes yesterday and frankly I’m shitting myself.”